Learn As You Go
by ZivaFan2481
Summary: Ziva has gone through a lot to get to where she is now, but she wouldn't change a thing in the end.


A/N: This is my first story for FanFiction. So please review and tell me how I did. The song is "Lessons Learned" by Carrie Underwood. Thank you!

Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or the song…

Ziva was totally exhausted by the time she had returned to Gibbs' and her house. They had to take on back to back cases and she was barely getting a break along with the rest of the team. But after weeks without downtime, Gibbs was able to convince the Director to give them a few days off.

"Glad to be home?" said her husband in a smooth voice.

"Glad to be home _with_ you, Jethro." She corrected.

Gibbs gently guided his wife over to the coach and had her sit on his lap. "This job can be tough sometimes." He casually stated as he started to rub Ziva's shoulders.

"Yes, it can. But, I would not change one bit of it." Ziva replied. The two sat in a comfortable silence while Ziva recalled everything she had to go through to get to this perfect spot.

_There's some things that I regret,  
>Some words I wish had gone unsaid,<br>Some starts,  
>That had some bitter endings,<em>

Throughout her life Ziva had made mistakes. Yes, it was true. Even a perfect assassin-in-training made mistakes that she had to live with.

_Been some bad times I've been through,  
>Damage I cannot undo,<br>Some things,  
>I wish I could do all all over again,<em>

She had been forced into some difficult situations where she had to make judgment calls. Sometimes she questioned her actions, if they were right or not.

_But it don't really matter,  
>Life gets that much harder,<br>It makes you that much stronger,_

She had learned quickly at Mossad that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. She still lived by the same principle today.

_Oh, some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were,  
>Lessons learned.<em>

Disasters had happened along with the loss of loved ones early on in her life. But, after everything, every problem, there was always a lesson learned.

And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,<p>

At night, she would sometimes cry herself to sleep. All of the stress would finally catch up to her and she had to let it out. But, Ziva had to be strong, she never let anyone see her cry except her little sister, Tali.

_Every change, life has thrown me,  
>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,<br>I'm grateful, for every scar,_

Every injury and wound would eventually form a scar. The scar was there to remind Ziva of a mistake that she had made. A mistake she would learn from.

_Some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were lessons learned._

After years in Mossad, she needed to break free. Ziva left for NCIS, a place she hoped she would be accepted after everything that had occurred.

There's mistakes that I have made,  
>Some chances I just threw away,<p>

Ziva was determined to find a place on the tight knit team. She would not throw away the chance at having something that seemed like a family. A family that she dreamed she would find.

_Some roads,  
>I never should've taken,<br>Been some signs I didn't see,_

The one time she had been so foolish to think that she was safe in the world of Mossad had ended horribly.

_Hearts that I hurt needlessly,  
>Some wounds,<br>That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,_

She had broken the heart of her boyfriend and her teammates. Ziva knew she had to make it right, she sacrificed herself to go finish what she had started. She did this knowing that there was little chance of her ever coming back.

_But it don't make no difference,  
>The past can't be rewritten,<br>You get the life you're given,_

Sometimes you are unable to escape the life you were made for, but she was willing to try. Even if it meant giving up everything she was used to, her country and her training.

_Oh, some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were,  
>Lessons learned.<br>_

Ziva learned that sometimes the ones you look up to, her father, are not as reliable as you think. He had learned of the failed mission and didn't even bother to look for her. Ziva didn't know much about regular families but according to Gibbs, you do what you have to for family. A rule Eli did not follow.

_And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,<br>Every change, life has thrown me,  
>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,<em>

Every betrayal, every disappointment, had guided her in the right direction in the end.

_I'm grateful, for every scar,  
>Some pages turned,<br>Some bridges burned,  
>But there were lessons learned.<em>

Her journey had been rough at times, but she pushed through._  
><em>

_And all the things that break you,  
>Are all the things that make you strong,<em>

At NCIS, Ziva learned that showing emotions and love was not a sign of weakness. They were what made her human.

_You can't change the past,  
>Cause it's gone,<br>And you just gotta move on,_

The past is the past she had once told them. And that was just it. You can't change what has happened, all you can do is improve and move on.

_Because it's all,  
>Lessons learned.<em>

And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
>Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,<br>Every change, life has thrown me,  
>I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,<br>I'm grateful, for every scar,

Her experiences were what defined her. Ziva was all tough and sometimes cold on the outside, but she cared and loved her dysfunctional family on the inside. She loved all their little quirks and odd personalities that went with them.

_Some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were lessons learned,_

It had been a long and difficult journey to get where she was now. One filled with heartbreak and mistakes.

_Oh, some pages turned,  
>Some bridges burned,<br>But there were lessons learned,  
>Lessons learned.<em>

In the end she had achieved what she had always wanted, ever since she was a little girl. A loving husband and a family that cared about her.

Gibbs' voice brought her out of her thoughts, "I wouldn't change it for the world. I love you, Ziver."

Ziva turned around to give him a light kiss, "Love you too, Jethro."


End file.
